You won't change until it hurts badly enough
Have you noticed that you don't change until something prompts you to do so? What prompts you to change comes from one of two things, "love" or "hate" (you can substitute the word "anger" for hate if you prefer). But in my own experience, the biggest driving force isn't a desire to reward myself for changing something - "i'd really love to be thin, fit and healthy" - no it's more like - "I hate being unfit, I hate not being able to wear the clothes that I want to, I hate getting out of breath running up the stairs" - so we embark on a fitness campaign that is not driven by a desire to enjoy it, we are doing it out of frustration and annoyance with our current bodies.
I have noticed this goes for most things that really need doing too. Yesterday I spent 5 hours in the garden - working on one garden bed, and I'll upload some photos onto the web in the not too distant future so you can see for yourself. It wasn't because I really like gardening, I don't. It's something that needs to be doing, like cleaning the bathroom, which is why it took me 5 hours to weed the one garden bed. If I'd enjoyed it, it wouldn't have needed overhauling, i'd have been out there most weekends. The reason why yesterday was the day to get the garden done, was because i was totally fed up with it. I was sick and tired of going out of the drive way and cringeing at the very healthy weeds that filled the space.
What is it with you? What prompts you to get on with something? Do you do things out of duty and obligation? Do you do things because you love the thought of change? Or are you like me, only do the major changes if you get annoyed at the situation you find yourself in.
Now I am aware, that what I find annoys me and will prompt me to do something, may not be the thing that prompts you do change. And that's the trouble with most of the rest of the "motivational type" speakers out there. They have a one size fits all philosophy that just doesn't work. Do this and great things will happen to you!!
So over the next few days, but if you can, today, after all today is sunday - I would like you to reflect back to a time when you really needed to change something. Did you do it out of a desire to be better, or was it driven from a negative perspective?
It's also interesting to note, you are more likely to sustain the changes over the long term if you enjoy the process.
So work out what you need to change, and then work out why you aren't taking the steps you need to make those changes. Only then can you determine if you need to get a personal trainer to push you into becoming fit, hire a painter, gardener or anyone else, or whether you can go it alone.


September 25, 2006 at 16:01
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