Deconstruct before you reconstruct

We usually set goals because we are not happy with what we have and want more. That's OK, but there are a couple of things I need you to think about.

1. Are you thankful for what you have achieved / received / accomplished so far? - You need to be thankful, doesn't mean you have to be content to stay with what you have, but you do need to be thankful for what you have.

2. We usually start from a negative - I need to lose weight, I need to stop smoking - actually we need to stop thinking negatively for a moment to truly begin the process of change. And this is why we need to deconstruct before we can reconstruct our lives in the way that we want to live from now on.

So - that said -

When starting a new program – what determines success or failure?

a.    Attitude – I want to do this, I am sick of this happening (Can be positive or negative influence)
b.    Belief system – does your belief system support you or dismiss the changes you say you want to make.
c.    Value system – what do you really value in your life. You cannot value good health if you eat junk food and don’t exercise.

These 3 things then determine how much time and energy you are willing to devote to the program and the process of change.

You need strength of character that says – what I’ve done in the past hasn’t worked and I am willing to make some changes so they can work now.

So, the basis for any program is a desire to change.

Deconstruction phase:

Identify all behaviours and actions that have led you to this point – don’t worry it may be a long list, but identifying everything means you can get to the heart of what the real problems are. Don’t stop when things are getting a little tough – that’s the point where you sub-conscious is trying to hide from you….now you are getting somewhere. Take a deep breath and keep digging, keep writing and keep examining what you are finding. The more uncomfortable this process becomes, the closer you get to the real truth.

a.    What are you happy to keep
b.    What do you need to get rid of?

How do you identify habits?
§    Be honest
§    Keep a time / food log / diary
§    Keep strict accounts
§    Who do you spend time with?
§    What do you read?
§    What do you watch on TV?
§    What do you listen to on the radio>
§    How do you spend your free time

What are you willing to give up in order to move forwards with your goals?

Reconstruction phase

Understand how your attitude, belief system and value can make a difference between success and failure.

1.    Attitude
2.    Belief system
3.    Value system

Attitude: Who is to blame? Are you willing to accept your part in the process? Only when you are can you begin the process of moving forwards.

Belief system: What do you believe?
§            Do you believe you can?
§            Do you believe you can have?
§            Do you believe you are not “lucky” enough to have everything you want in life?
§            Do you believe you are worthy of more?
§            Do you believe that people won’t like you when you become successful?
§            Do you believe you will fail – so you never begin?
§            Do you believe you won’t be able to sustain the success if you achieve success once?
§            Do you believe you are a victim of circumstances?

3.    What do you value the most? When we talk about value what I mean is this - You need to value you and your own self-worth. And you do that when you need to put yourselves first sometimes.

Now you can begin to start thinking about your goals - what do you want? Remember you have one life, how do you want to live it?