What do you want to do today dear?

Planning and preparation is essential when you are deciding on what you want to do with your life. Failure to plan means you are going to fall prey to everyone else's plans and goals and you can guarantee they won't have your best interests at heart - absolutely not, they'll be thinking of themselves and their needs.

One of the best ways I can illustrate this point is the classic phrase uttered by millions of people across the world every single day

"What do you want to do today dear"

Have you ever been tempted to say "well I don't mind" and then hated every minute of the activity they then chose. How many arguments did those 2 lines generate as a result - again probably millions, every single day.

Why we should expect other people to be our entertainment's manager is beyond me. If I want to do something, I decide, I plan, I prepare and I do it. It may take me 5 minutes or it may take me years - it depends on the monetary cost and how far ahead I need to plan. I've been to concerts, exhibitions, openings and a myriad of other things on my own, because I am not willing to

a) give up on the opportunity
b) wait for other people to make up their mind as to whether they want to do something or not.

I always ask, and if there are no takers, then I go on my own.

I was speaking to one lady who was recently divorced, about her new year's resolutions. She said she had always been part of someone else's plans and part of a "couple", and had never had to go anywhere on her own. Now she was spreading her wings just a little and she had plans to do something "socially" on her own every week. For her it was and always will be a momentous step as she becomes an independent person once more.

And with goals we do need to look at what WE want to achieve. We need to look at it as OUR future, not everyone else's future. It may be like "J" as simple a thing as gaining confidence to go somewhere on her own AND enjoy the experience. Or it may be something as amazing as climbing Kilimanjaro, which is the plan of another friend of mine this year. His partner will stay home, but it is something he has always wanted to do, and the plans are in place and he is currently getting even fitter so he can handle the climb. His wife just thinks he's mad... but she has always supported him in his goals, and he hers.

Now, I am not saying there cannot be an element of joint plans and goal achievements of course not. But to be honest, we can be giving up on our own dreams and goals if we really don't want to do what "they" want to do.

So, how do you plan?

Well, as with all things, I think it comes down to one simple question that can take a whole life to answer ...

"What do you want to do with your life dear?"

With many thoughts

Elle