Some of the better excuses kids tell their parents to write:

Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

Dear School. Please excuse Johnbeing absent on Jan, 28,29, 30, 31, 32 and also 33

Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administerating.

Please excuse Roland from PE for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.

Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had diahre dyrea diretha the sh....

Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. HE had diarrhea and his boots leak.

Source Western Teacher Newspaper August 2000